Friday, July 22, 2011

Random thoughts.

I guess that's the nature of having a head injury. The holes in my head are like sun spots, causing random flickers of light and darkness.

I read a blog post about regrets, and it made me think of mine.
  • not having a boyfriend in junior high or high school--my female friends don't understand this. These female friends by the way had plenty of boyfriends, and I was lucky enough to live vicariously through them. Anyway, having a boyfriend seemed like a rite of passage that I missed out on. Also having a boyfriend in my younger years might have prepared me for college men. I will always believe that the reason I didn't have a boyfriend until college was that I was too ugly when I was in junior high and high school. My senior year I looked as good as I ever did, but still had the baggage of the years that came before that. Anyway if you think that looks don't matter. Ask yourself what makes you want to purchase a car or an article of clothing. I would submit that the look of the car gets you to go for a test drive. Then if the thing drives well, in addition to being hot, you've just committed to 36-60 months of payments. Even houses have to have "curbside" appeal. I didn't have curbside appeal.

  • cancer--there are already things I am missing out on because of my disease: driving, and working, but I also regret what I may miss out on in the future. My goal is to live to see my son graduate high school, but that may be too much to ask for. On the plus side, I know so many people with life-threatening or chronic illnesses, and having cancer I hope has made me a better sounding board for those people.

  • not having a biological child: I do love my adopted son, but I always thought women were supposed to have babies. I was given a womb, even menstruation, but no eggs, so I have on many occasion felt, at best, inadequate, and at worst, a little cheated.
I will leave with you with a wonderful line from my husband:

I'm not interrupting, you just aren't thinking fast enough.

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