Thursday, June 24, 2010

Hope and stupidity

Hope comes in wearing a lab coat
that covers his ass
in case anything bad happens
He can just wash his lab coat

Hope thinks I'm strong enough for torture
But he didn't ask me.
He thinks I'm fine because I'm not dead.
But he didn't ask me.


Stupidity comes in wearing a lab coat.
He looks all important and shit.
Still he tells me there are no good answers
But he doesn't want me to try to find my own.

Stupidity leaves with his tail
curled up between his legs.
I'm sorry for wasting his time.
Is he sorry for wasting mine?

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Won't come back again.

I'll be falling out of bed
with a huge lump in my head
And soon
all my memories will be gone

So a surgeon looks a me
And my pictures on a screen
In a few weeks his buzz saw sings the song.


I'll tip my hat to a new kind of cancer.
Even though there still is no answer
Smile and grin about the things I can't do now.
I picked up my guitar and played
as badly as yesterday.
And I'll get on my knees and pray..
It won't come back again.

They want a central line
up my behind
so the medicine gets
where it needs
And the tumor on the right
is still the tumor on the right.
although it seemed to grow longer overnight.

I'll tip my hat to a new kind of cancer.
Even though there still is no answer
Smile and grin about the things I can't do now.
I picked up my guitar and played
as badly as yesterday.
And I'll get on my knees and pray..
It won't come back again.
I'll tip my hat to a new kind of cancer.
Even though there still is no answer
Smile and grin about the things I can't do now.
I picked up my guitar and played
as badly as yesterday.
And I'll get on my knees and pray..
It won't come back again.

I"ll have my family put me aside
sometimes I feel too much trouble alive
No I know that the doctors and stats don't lie.
Do they?
I'll tip my hat to a new kind of cancer.
Even though there still is no answer
Smile and grin about the things I can't do now.
I picked up my guitar and played
as badly as yesterday.
And I'll get on my knees and pray..
It won't come back again.


Meet the new tumor...
same as the old tumor...


Monday, June 14, 2010

Thank you!

We'll it's done...the birth of the Toxic Twinkie's sister. I'm tired but walking, so that is a goodness.
I was really suprised by the support I received before, during and post surgery. And I want to thank a few folks:


To my parents: For being a constant comfort to me. It's hard being sick, but it's harder having a sick kid.

To my sis, who helped put me in the mood for the hell that was to come. She also took some award winning photos of me. I hope she learns to use her iPhone soon.

To my old classmates who really stepped up to the plate and offered me daily encouragement. So good to know you care.

To some folks I worked with in TV news who also expressed their support for me.

To my son, who wheeled me out of the hospital and made sure I had a stuffed animal to snuggle with at night.

To my husband who is making sure I take my post-op meds.

To my book group friends who came to see me at the hospital
To everyone who has brought over dinner or flowers.
To my cancer writing group friends, who I hope to see again soon,
I have to admit it's getting better... a little better all the time.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Under the Knife

In two days time it will time to give birth to the Toxic Twinkie's Sister. In her honor, I have written her a song, set to the tune of the Rolling Stones' "Under My Thumb".

Under the knife
The tumor that crowded my head
Under the knife
Then days of fun spent in a hospital bed.

Yippee Yippee
Oh Yeah
Let the doctor do just what he
Wants to with me
No time to cry
I'm under the knife

Under the knife
Hoping that I can walk
Under the knife
But you better hope
That I cannot talk

Yippee Yippee
Oh Yeah
Let the doctor do just what he
Wants to with me
No time to cry
I'm under the knife

Under the knife
It's medical experiments for me
Under the knife
and oh how I wish I could flee

Yippee Yippee
Oh Yeah
Let the doctor do just what he
Wants to with me
No time to cry
I'm under the knife

Under the knife
I wonder what will happen next
Under the knife
Can I just get my rest

Yippee Yippee
Oh Yeah
Let the doctor do just what he
Wants to with me
No time to cry
I'm under the knife


Hawaii 2010

Over Memorial Day weekend, we went on a trip to Hawaii, to get my mind off my upcoming surgery, and to get some fun and sun in. Mission accomplished!