As of now I am off chemotherapy, but we're watching my head closely with scans and blood tests every three months.
I am thrilled to have this break from chemo. Sometimes I am told "you didn't have the heavy-duty chemo". It's true that it was convenient to be able to take it at home, and at one point I thought Temodar wasn't "heavy-duty" chemo either.
Until I actually took it.
I mentioned that every once in a while, I have to make a reality check--have a "come to Jesus" meeting with my head. Today was one of those days--MRI day.
MRIs are like being buried alive with Beck music, specifically the following tracks:
"Devil's Haircut", "E-pro" and "Novacane". This threw me for a loop the first time I had one, but now I'm a Zen Master. I can almost sleep through the exam.
I can't help but get nervous on MRI day. Today it took longer than usual--more like 45 minutes instead of the standard 30 minutes. As I write this I'm wondering if the test showed scary changes. If it didn't this time, it might next time, or the time after that. All will be revealed in a week when I visit my current oncologist.
In my more sober moments, I have referred to my tumor as an assassin or stalker, threatening me, but never letting me know when or if it's going to pull the trigger.
So I'll go listen to some Beck.