Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Communication Breakdown

My computer is maybe 10 feet away from my spouse's. I speak to him in his language:

"I'd like to make a meeting request," I say.

No response.

The meeting I'd like to have is regarding our son, who is drawing unwanted attention from the recess duty teacher today, and, in fact, has been since school started over a week ago.

I continue my exchange of emails with my son's teacher, and almost give up on my husband when ten minutes after my "meeting request" he says:

"So, you wanted to request a meeting dear?"

"If you don't mind, dear," I retort.

"I'm available the next half hour".

So we attempt to have a serious conversation, while he's getting a glass of water, I'm going to the bathroom, and so on. Despite the awkward circumstances the discussion is fruitful.

Skip to dinner:  I'm cooking and get spattered by hot oil.  I yell at the top of my lungs "OOOUCH"!

The man on the couch behind the paper doesn't hear the scream, so I have the following scintillating conversation with myself:

"Gee dear, You all right?"

"Yes, I'm super. Thanks for asking."

"Dinner smells good, dear!"

"Why, thank you, dear."

The couch/paper man all of a sudden comes to life and says something like:

"You know dear, you aren't crazy yet.  At least you aren't arguing with yourself."

Cold comfort. I'm sure that if I were arguing with myself, I'd still lose. I'll see if I have any better luck getting my son to do his homework,  than I did trying to reach couch/paper man.

It's amazing how people can live in the same house and have nothing to say.


Yukon said...

I think you have just described a scene from pretty much "any town/any household USA!" The theme may vary, but the theme is the same! My spousal unit "loathes" my "conversations with me" when I do that, so it made me laugh to hear you do the "I'm fine, thanks for your concern." Can SO RELATE! It made me laugh!

Tina said...

me, too!