The Breakfast Club

I got reacquainted with one of my favorite movies, The Breakfast club. I purchased it on iTunes and watched it on my phone. If I were a teacher, I would consider showing it to students, perhaps uncut; although, there is foul language and the kids in it get stoned.

Students in Middle and High school feel awkward and a need to belong--anywhere. I believe the movie makes the point that, while the need to belong is a normal desire for a school kid, no clique is superior to another. Example:

Princess: "So (physics club) is an ACADEMIC Club."..."It's not the same as other types of clubs."

Bender: "But to dorks like him, it is."

It also makes the point that despite all the attitude and bravado, high school kids are still just kids.

By the way, I am most like the basket case.

The Turd Years

Especially since I am an adoptive parent, I cannot fail in my charge to make my son a good citizen. No consequence seems great enough to teach him common sense. He is 12 and in seventh grade--the Turd Years, as our friend has dubbed this stage of life.

He is a very smart young man, but will forget about or misplace assignments. His math teacher offered to work with him after school hours to help him catch up. I suggested he accept her help, but he seemed offended that she didn't appreciate his math prowess. How dare she want him to turn something. in that was due IN DECEMBER!

Turd Years indeed.

In addition, I closed my Facebook account, and made him close his because he kept blocking me and posting threatening messages. When he found out that didn't work, he got mad at me for invading his privacy.

What I'm wondering is this: If the pre-teens are The Turd Years, then what are the teen years? The I'm an Infatuation Junkie and I know everything years?

A week in The LiFe

Just finished up a round of chemotherapy and today I had an MRI. Sometimes it seems I'm always at the doctor's office Here's how next week is shaping up:

Monday: Hopefully I will have the Plantar Wart of Doom removed

Tuesday: I will get the results of my latest MRI and find out whether I live or die (Well that's what it feels like when your wondering if your cancer has grown.)

Wednesday: Therapy, because everyone around me needs it

Thursday: Go see a play and get a break from doctor's YAY!

Friday: Entertain my son and his friend

Grace

Depending on who you talk to, I'm either handling my terminal illness with a positive attitude and humor, or am becoming so bitter and angry that no one will want to be my caregiver when I really need one. As in--wipe my bottom--need one.

The thing is, as much as I would like to, I can't make myself feel better about my illness, let alone someone else. My perspective is that of a patient, not a caregiver. Every day I do the best I can to work with what brain power I still have left, and compensate for what I don't have.

I have had a tendency since before my illness, and certainly now, to go negative and think about the things that suck, but especially since I am dying, such thinking is counterproductive. So from here on end I will try to adapt an attitude of I DON'T CARE...as in:

• I'm not jealous of someone who seems better off than I am
• I don't care that someone called me fat and ugly 25 years ago
• I don't care what someone else thinks of me
• I don't care that my career was short
• I don't really care that I'm dying but I would like to control the timing of my passing

In other words, I am going to try to kick my shit to the curb. I don't want to take it with me.

I hope I am successful in this endeavor.

Have bullies changed

My son is navigating the tough waters of Middle School and the stupid stuff that comes with it--crushes, mean teachers and bullying.

I am concerned that the powers at be don't seem to know the difference between a bully and a pain in the ass.

When I was in middle school I was bullied, because I was threatened, told (via a letter in my locker) I would be beaten up on my way home from school. In my case, I went to a counselor and named names. I assumed I was right in my guess, because I received no more threats.

My son says he's being bullied but won't talk to counselors or teachers at school about it. They don't seem to take him seriously. We have found someone he will talk to. Meantime he keeps lamenting how bullies seem to know when there isn't a safe person around, and how bullies bring their "friends" for backup. He thinks bullies are smarter than back in my day, but I don't think it was smart to write a note and stuff it in my locker. Whoever did that was just as cowardly as any bully today.

I'm glad bullying is getting some attention, because it didn't until some kids started committing suicide because of it.

School grounds should be safe for all. A child who goes to school in fear can't learn.